- me: damn its hot as fuck outside
- me: *wears all black*
the most iconic song lyric will always be
“tell your boyfriend that if he’s got beef that I’m a vegetarian and I ain’t fuckin scared of him”
today i was in hot topic with my mom and there was a bra with Simba on it so I asked her “want a lion king bra?” she said “why would i?” so I put it in front of my chest and said “hakuna ma tatas” she had to leave the store she was laughing so hard.
when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank
they’re married now